The “After”

They lie naked together. She rested her head on him and gently stroked his chest. She breathed him in, as it was nice to smell a man in her home. They briefly spoke – mostly of random things. She closed her eyes because she knew what he’d say next. “Well, I have to be somewhere soon.” 

“Ok.”

He got up and got dressed. Embarrassed, she covered her nakedness with a blanket. She looked for her clothes without exposing herself. She was ashamed, as she always is after. 

This always happens – she thought to herself. After he was fully dressed, he kissed her on her forehead, and quickly left. She knew she wouldn’t see him again for another month. 

She washed herself or anything left on her body. She washed herself of his smell. She was never really clean though. She couldn’t wash her mind of the thoughts, of the longing to be with him. She couldn’t wash her mind of the thought that he was just going onto his next woman. 

She didn’t recognize her reflection. She didn’t recognize her body. She wanted herself back most of all. 

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